It is 7.24 in the morning. It is more than an hour since I got up and I haven’t created anything out of it other than a cup of lime juice with honey. I lay awake on bed for quite long, feeling very good that I had a restful, undisturbed sleep.
But my thoughts lying awake were about the very forgettable day I had at office yesterday. I let distractions at work disturb the flow. This feeling weighed heavily on me yesterday and persists even this morning. I visited my blog posts a few times and my emails many times more, during office hours.
So, my day resembled a glass of clean water in which ink was poured.
I tried yesterday, reading the four pages of my well formed outcome and the intentions behind them, but I stopped reading midway. It sounded so hollow in that state.
While going to the kitchen, Lolakutty follows me there. And, when I return with lime juice in hand, she is at my heels. I bend down and stroke her. She sits near me, licking my feet, very contented. Then she goes to a corner to do her favourite thing – sleeping.
I look at her and think to myself, what if I develop the type of devotion and love for my business that Lola displays for me! Or, better yet, that I lavish on her!
I have set myself high expectation and outcomes for myself and with regard to my business. I am more focused and serious nowadays, but my weakness for the easy and pleasant things gets the better of me every now and then.
I do not go for my run this morning and sits down to write this post, instead.
Today I am more mindful of Lola than usual and I realize I did not clean her eyes and the deep creases on her face for sometime. When I do not tend to the cleaning regularly, her skin and eyes develop all types of complications and she ends up at the vet’s place.
As I clean her eyes and apply ointment in her eyes my thoughts shift to Service Square. And I tell myself to apply myself to the many works that cry for my attention at office.
Lola is such a blessing, she is very passionate about everything she does, despite age catching up with her and the slowing reflexes.
When she wants food, she comes and sits in front of me while I have my food, with a demeanor suggesting she has not had a morsel of food in several days. If I do not give it to her, she barks – the only time in her life she does that.
As I return from office, there is an excitement about her, shaking her short, plump body feverishly, making me feel very warm inside.
And when I take her out do her potty, she makes me wait impatiently for an eternity till she finds the terrain of her choice with the right incline for her to be in the exact position to let go. I am yet to spot such a perfectionist, creating a ritual around doing potty.
And, when Anusha comes, she goes to her for a round of socializing. She comes back to my room soon enough, to Anusha’s annoyance.
In fact, there is excitement and an element of excellence in everything Lola does – when she is awake, that is.
Anusha thinks Lola is a master manipulator and of late, has started calling her “the Queen” for her regal bearing and the attention she manages to get. Lola takes such undignified taunts in her stride. The truth is despite what she says, Anusha just can’t do without Lola.
For Anusha and me, the relationship with Lola is very deep and special.
Saint Exupery’s words – “It’s the time you spent on your rose that makes your rose so important..” ring very true.
It is really not the number of hours that makes the crucial difference, it is the quality of those hours. It is the intensity.
“Every action is either strong or weak, and when every action is strong we are successful.”
I have seen these words before, but today they reverberate within me because of the simple and powerful truth it hides. It is telling me, be true to what I am doing. Focus on one thing at a time with all my might, when I am at it.
These are words of Wallace D. Wattles. I do not have even a shred of doubt that I wandered and drifted in the past in my business and personal life because my actions were weak. They did not have the intensity – despite the long hours.
The only way for me to relate with intensity to my business is to love my business. As I said at the beginning, as devoted and loving to my business as Lola is to me. And I am to her.
The same is true with my relationships. When love is present, intensity develops and the world becomes beautiful.
Lola spends most of her time sleeping. Very deeply. What matters is, her waking hours are very alive, special and intense.
When I work, I work with passion, total involvement and focus. Because I love my business. And, because I work with intensity, I find love for my business lurking round the corner.
There are other things in life too, which are important to me. Like the need to relax and enjoy everything I do.
I find time to run, to write, to invest with Anusha and Lola, to meet people, to read, to meditate, to watch movies and many other things I love doing. I do all of them with all the vigor at my command.
I work when I work and play when I play. Fully present, feeling fully.
I started this blog post yesterday and am completing it late in the evening today, a day later.
Today at office, it was an exceptionally good day. The churning that happened all through the day with these thoughts doing their work ensure that. I am on a high now. I feel strong.
There is no way I want to experience the lows of life again. I have left behind the weak actions.