Last Friday, on March 14, I went to my office very late – only after 4 pm. The reason was, from 5.30 am that day I was slogging away editing our weekly bulletin, Chennai This Week (CTW). If I had planned things better and focused better, I would have been in the office in the morning itself, as usual.
Going through the work of our staff in the evening, I found the report of one of our staff was less than honest – a matter of deliberately touching up the temporary dip in business with a dash of imagination. I was very upset.
This discovery was soon after we found provisions doing the disappearing act in the house.
Yesterday in the office, I noticed, business was coming, but we did not have enough people to fulfill them on two successive days. I felt very restless inside.
And I was itching to burst out when I saw a few housekeeping staff taking their time to leave with materials for their jobs of the day.
Yet, all these are happening when the muddle in my head is clearing and I am using a language that is liberating and empowering. I am reading my ‘outcome’ and the 4 pages of intentions behind them, everyday with fervor.
I am shaken that the people I trusted betrayed that trust. It is an unsettling feeling.
In this presently shaken world of mine there is a truth yelling out for my attention.
It is, in the office, I delegated and then abdicated.
And, in the house, I did not value enough the provisions I bought with precious money. I used to be mindless about what came in and what went out.
I was not aware of my resources and gifts – in the office or at home.
This morning, in Deepak Chopra’s guided meditation, I was arrested by his stream of thoughts. He says, Stewardship is about responsibly caring for what we value. And, every action we take generates a force of energy that returns to us in kind. ‘As we sow, so shall we reap.’ As we take conscious choices to care for what we have, more will be given to us. This is the essence of the law of karma.
It boils down to – if I want responsible behavior in office, I have to be responsible first.
I value my company very dearly and I am called to be a responsible steward.
And, trusting someone does not mean being blindfolded. I lovingly apply the principle of stewardship first towards myself. I value myself enough to attract the right situations and people into my life – by living in awareness.
This morning, as I walked to my office, I felt angry, upset, determined, overwhelmed, possessed, intimidated and consumed by an amalgam of conflicting feelings. I know this is not at all pure NLP language. Let it be for now.
I reached my office very early today. The way I worked today was a throwback to the old days when everything I touched turned to gold.
I spoke to our team without mincing my words, in firm tones where we stand now and why we need to change our behaviours to head towards our beautiful goals.
I feel different today. There is satisfaction for staying focused. Tomorrow I feel even more different and more tuned in, to work, to achieve.
I read this last week in Seth Godin’s blog. “It’s easy to feel confident when we’re on a roll, when the cards are going our way……. Effective confidence comes from within, it’s not the result of external events. You succeed because you’ve chosen to be confident. “
That is an empowering idea to anchor in my mind.
I notice happy constellations and serendipities emerging. By the way I choose to look at even very daunting challenges, I can usher in happy outcomes. Very much like Richard Bach says:
“But the sky knows the reasons and the patterns behind all clouds, and you will know, too, when you lift yourself high enough to see beyond horizons”
I see my outcome embracing me.