I nearly lost all of my blog posts a few days back. Last year I had transferred this blog hosted by my friend in the US to Chennai shores. Someone here forgot to follow through midway, after initiating the process. My friend saved the day for me by retrieving from his company’s server all he had – till the time of transfer.
I will put back together whatever I have of the missing posts of the last 10 months from the drafts that remain in my computer.
At any rate, the last ten months did not witness regular posts from me though I had promised in one of those posts that I would write a post of about 500 words daily.
Not a day passed since that promise without being reminded about sitting down to write. Yes, I got caught up in the unfolding events of those months. I lost along the way the rigour and the rhythm needed to be in the flow.
Sometimes, it was the weariness I yielded to. And, there were days which were fully packed. Sometimes I reconciled myself to the vacant feeling inside. Often I would put off writing for the next day. At other times, I felt I had no inspiration to guide my writing.
Often enough, I stayed stuck because of my misplaced penchant for perfection. I waited for the perfect idea, the perfect setting and the perfect expressions. Progress often lags behind at the mercy of perfection.
On those six days in early March when I did not have this blog I wondered to myself whether it was not a sign from the universe to quit writing here.
The question has often crossed my mind, does the time I spend on writing prevent me from achieving my life goals?
Despite the temptations, I know it would be unwise to quit. Writing won many a day for me when I was listless and limping in life. It gave me a sense of my moorings. Writing here is an opportunity I have to stay with myself, while exploring my deepest desires. The words I find here give me the strength to exorcise my demonic fears.
Writing is a means for me to live fully in all the aspects of life that matter to me – business, relationships, family, running, exploring, loving… In the flow of writing, all these areas of my existence glow in the light of its energy.
Writing challenges me to embrace new experiences even as I persist with the ones that have sustained me so far.
There is also the factor of seeking inspiration for my writing from thoughts and wisdom contained in books.
The posts here are the fuel that gives wings to the ideas and desires contained in them. I am often a victim of procrastination, waiting endlessly for the right time to take action. This blog is the platform where the frustrations of inaction bubble up and leave their trail. That trail is often the forerunner of breaking out into action.
Whether it is with regard to writing or any other sphere of life, there is a huge cost to be paid for making even marginal concessions to postponing to do the right thing. The compromises and concessions I make along the way snowball into huge weights that ground me in parched lands instead of soaring in the direction of my dreams.
It all boils down to getting my processes right. When actions are guided by well thought out steps, they are my aid in navigating my life.
In the end, everything begins with the end. It is my goals in life and the strength of those goals that shape my thoughts, actions and processes.
I have been on a meandering path very long. I nearly lost sight of my way in the digressions that cropped up along the meandering paths.
It is time to revisit my goals and see where I stand now.